The Best You Expo: why you should go & what should you see.

I’ll be honest: I’m kind of addicted to personal development. Ever since I began studying Coaching and then studied NLP and then Hypnotherapy and now Naturopathic Nutrition, I’ve been hooked on working on improving myself. So it’s no surprise that from last year when I began exhibiting at The Best You Expo, I knew that I felt right at home there. I felt the same this year at the MInd Body Spirit festival (another one that I plan to be at again next year). I’m now giving talks at quite a few self-development events about the health benefits of Connection as well as about the importance of loving oneself inside and out (meaning the importance of self-value and self-care).
Despite all of my rounds of talks, there’s something special and close to the heart for me about The Best You Expo. First of all, The Best You I feel is kind of where I took the big leap from just being another Coach to becoming the kind of speaker, author and motivator that makes things happen for my clients. In fact, it’s thanks to the NLP training I had with Richard Bandler with The Best You that I wrote my first book and that I had my first true possibility to speak in front of an audience of strangers with this new career leap I took some years back. So speaking and exhibiting at The Best You is just something that I feel called to do on so many levels. And I love it! But I also love the opportunity to meet many other wonderful speakers and exhibitors and to see them live. So here’s a small list of who we love and advise you to come and see and listen to at the Best You Expo on the 16th and 17th February at the Olympia in South Kensington. And of course, make sure you come and hear me speaking about the Importance and Power of Connection at 2pm of Friday the 16th and 1pm on Saturday the 17th of February in the Health and Lifestyle room, press here.

Buy your Best You Expo special priced tickets here (special code for those on my mailing list & social media only).

Paul McKenna : “The 3 things that will change your destiny”: 17th February 13:30, the main stage. 

Paul McKenna is one of the top hypnotherapists in the world, and is renowned for helping people treat the most difficult problems. He is definitely one to be heard.

Bernardo Moya: “The Question”: 16th of February 13:00, the main stage. 

Bernardo is not only an incredible mentor, a wonderful teacher and an icon of success, but he is also the founder of The Best You and a person for whom empowering others is a true heart-centered journey. I feel blessed and honoured to have worked with, and learned from, him. If you are looking for ways in which turn from passive to active this is the talk for you to go to. Bernardo will explain why he thinks the quality of life depends on the questions we ask ourselves. This is definitely one to go to!

Jason Vale: “Reignite the healthy fire within”: 17th February 12:00, the main stage

Jason, aka “the Juice Master” is renowned for making juicing as well known for its’ health benefits as it is. He’s speaking again this year helping us all to benefit from the incredible health benefit of juicing.

Judymay Murphy: “Finally collect what’s yours: 16 February 11:00, the main stage

Judymay was one of my own personal first coaches that helped me to begin my journey and to understand what my work was worth. Now she’s at the Best You Expo helping others to get started towards their dreams too.

 

Marie Diamond: “Secret to Success”: 17 February 11:00, the main stage.

Marie Diamond is a name well-known for years in the Success industry. Featured in “The Secret” books, she helps many well-known names to reach even greater success using the Law of Attraction. She is definitely one not to be missed!

 

Elliot Kay: “Elliot Kay workshop”: 16 February 12:00, Passion to profit room

As someone who’s heard Elliot speak on quite a few occasions, I can easily say that his workshops can be business altering, especially for those with businesses they’d like to grow, even if in the beginning stages. Elliot’s way of looking at strategy helps businesses thrive in just the direction they want to go.

Paul Boross: “Pimp your pitch”: 17 February 16:00, Best for Business room. 

Paul aka “The Pitch Doctor” is a whizz at taking a pitch and making it so much more. I’ve watched him in action on numerous occasions and am always impressed. You will be too once you realise just how important a well-crafted pitch could be to your business success.

Victoria Gerch: “Learn How to Create Professional Marketing Videos Using Your Smartphone”: 16th February 13:00, Best for Business room

Victoria is a whizz with a camera, even when it’s on a smartphone. As someone who’s been personally helped by Victoria’s fantastic tips on how to get a better video, I can vouch for how amazing it is to work with her. Anyone who uses video in their work should definitely check out her talk.

Cindy Galvin: “Discover The Platform For Success”: 16th February 15:00, Best for Business room

Cindy is a personal close friend and simply incredible woman! I’m honoured to know her and to be personal witness to her empowering journey. Cindy has come so far and has created her own success thanks to her ability to create that necessary confidence one needs to get into the high places in business. Now she shares her journey and her learning with the world. Not to be missed!

Louise Frances: “Find What Makes You Glow”: 17th February 14:00, Health and Lifestyle room

Louise is a friend, colleague and incredible person who’s done loads and overcome even more to come to a point of reaching her own personal dream. She speaks about helping stressed out individuals towards their own personal glow, something I definitely have a personal interest in hearing! 

Tea Guttsmann: “Children matters in court — 5 simple steps”, A Better World room

Tea is a personal friend and a beautiful person. Her mission to help children find a voice in court is tremendous and so necessary. Anyone with children should definitely come and hear her speak.

Florencia Serritella: Add some Latino to your life”:  17th February 16:00, Mindfulness and Wellbeing room

Florencia is a personal friend and a lovely, energetic and heart-driven person. She passionately shares her mission to help everyone find join in their life “the Latino way”!

Mikaela Jackson: “How to Self-Empower to Create a Career & Life You Love”: 17th February 13:00,  Empowering Women room

Mikaela is a friend and fellow Driven Woman member. She is a young inspiration and example of a woman living her dream, both in her personal and professional life. Mikaela shares how other women can do the same at her talk.

 

Hope you come and enjoy it!

The Importance of Connection

Do you ever feel lonely and alone and like you really miss the close connection with others or with someone special? Well apparently you’re not alone. In fact, the issue of loneliness has become such a significant situation in our current world that Theresa May has now appointed a new Minister for Loneliness to tackle the loneliness issue in the United Kingdom.
Connection, especially feeling that special connection with people who are close to you (family, friends, kids, your partner), is a wonderful sensation which immediately warms our hearts, makes us feel better and brings purpose to our existence. A truly good relationship, in fact, is one where the couple shares a special connection together. You’ve seen it before: that look that a couple shares that shows that they truly “get” each other. The same is true with two good friends who share so close a connection that they too have a special look they share between each other that speaks volumes. A good boss or manager is someone who manages to build that special connection with their employees where the latter feel truly heard, valued and understood — so much so that they thrive and find joy in helping the former and the company they work for succeed. The same can be said of one’s connection with oneself which is defined by a key self-understanding that’s deep enough to know what feels right and what doesn’t.
In the upcoming Best You Expo I shall be giving a talk (16th and 17th of February) on the importance of Connection “How to Truly Connect to Someone Special & Why it’s Good for You”.
In my work with clients up to now I’ve encountered many scenarios of couples loving each other yet missing that special connection with one another. Connection is that extraordinary link that comes and goes and that defines the glue of the relationships we are in. So what is Connection and how can we create it, claim it and hold onto it with the people we value? Well, I’ll be talking quite a bit about it in the next few weeks and in the lead up to the Best You Expo as well as at the Expo. Here is the video intro of my upcoming talk at the Expo on the 16th and 17th February at the Olympia in South Kensington.
From my observation connection naturally begins with being confident in oneself. After all, you have to feel well enough in you to feel comfortable approaching and opening something with someone else. When a new interaction occurs with another human being, feeling certain and confident with oneself allows the interaction to be truthful, honest and even somewhat vulnerable. Therefore the connection requires a quality of not being locked in oneself, not being overly self-centred about one’s issues and being brave enough to be open while also aware enough of comfort lines not to be crossed too quickly. In other words, we need to allow ourselves to be open and vulnerable, but while also keeping awareness of what is appropriate and deserved. This is a fine balance that needs to be learned and perfected and which takes time to master. Don’t worry, I’ve spent years perfecting it and now help many clients to cure their own loneliness through this fine art of connection. True connection begins with a connection with ourselves. This means understanding what feels right and when something doesn’t. It also means connection with our bodies and knowing when we need to take better care of ourselves. True connection is good for our health, is good for our soul and is good for our level of life happiness.
So it’s no surprise that I’ve decided to make my Talk at The Best You Expo on “the importance of Connection and how to master it”. If you would like to delve into the depths of Connection, come and hear my talk on the 16th and 17th of February and come and visit my Health and Lifestyle section stand C42. If you’d like to BEGIN working on this RIGHT AWAY, you can book a free call with me here: Schedule a free 30 minute Discovery Call with me here.
Check out The Best You Expo
My New Three Target Areas
It’s now 2018 and that means a clean slate to create the kind of life that we really want and to begin a new year afresh. The idea is to plan to change a small number of things that will help us to move closer to your goal. So what is your overall goal for the year (or up to three goals even) and what are things that you want to change in order to get you to where you want to be?
With 2018, my coaching business is changing quite a bit too. I now have three target areas in which I’ll be focusing and which I’ll help you to focus on too, with tips, tricks, giveaways and so much more. Have a look at my video below to find out more. Remember that we want to hear from you as well. Share your own 2018 goals and plans, and be entered into a raffle for a 90 minute FREE Love Health goal setting session on Skype.

Remember to buy your tickets for The Best You Expo: the best self-development event in London packed full with amazing speakers and great events and offers to benefit your self-development and self-growth. Details to purchase tickets below. If you buy them soon, you can still benefit from the Early Bird rates.

By Tickets Here

The Day Of Fate

Hey you,
The other day as I was talking to my assistant about the way we spend our New Years she mentioned a very interesting custom that they have in Georgia. They celebrate something called the “Day of Fate”, which occurs after New Years on the 2nd of January.
This day acts as a special, unique day during which whatever you do then, and how you spend it, determines how the rest of the year will unfold for you. It is a custom which really takes the idea of “Fate” to another level: so that your Fate is not only in the hands of a superior power, but becomes more in your control and determined by your behaviour. Wow, what a tradition!
Hence, in Georgia, on this day just after New Year’s you do things which make you happy, you see people with whom you would like to spend your coming year, you make sure to pamper yourself and indulge in copious self-care, but also work on what is important to you and embrace the fate that the day has brought you. It is a gentle balance between embracing your mysterious destiny with just enough power over personal direction. This idea really struck me when my Assistant recounted the tradition to me. I began to consider the many reasons why one should commit to such a ritual and found not only spiritual or celestial reasons but above all psychological reasons .

The idea is to do something you love, something that is good for you and something that you should improve on in your year. 

Take a moment now, shut your eyes and try to imagine: if you had one day in a year which determined your fate what would you do? What do you want your life to be filled with in 2018? For Georgians this process has now become instinctive to really decide and understand what you want and entrust it to fate. This is a day, during which you can do what is truly meaningful to you knowing that if you do this on that day, you might actually pave the way for the coming year to hold more of it for you as well.  The idea is to do something you love, something that is good for you and something that you should improve on in your year.
My Assistant herself told me of her fate day: during which she spent a morning with her husband at home basking in their mutual love and connection, spent time with close friends and family and spent time working. She decided to eat healthy to keep her mood positive. Amazingly, events unfolded naturally to assist her further so that she ended up invited last minute to another friend’s home where she met many new people and made some wonderful new contacts. Part of her day was planned by her; but the other part of the day was planned by Fate. The idea is to “surrender to the journey while keeping in mind an idea for the desired destination. Now my Assistant is ready to embrace the year of work (thankfully for me!), socialising with old and new friends and another happy year spent in harmony and Connection with her husband! Now imagine if we all could embrace something similar!
What about you? Does your culture, social group or family have any such customs? What about your plans for the destination for the coming year? New Year’s plans or resolutions? Share with us and we’ll share with you.

Share your 2018 plans and desires and we’ll give you a discount code good towards the purchase of my online product (click here) or a Hypnotherapy Confidence/ Self-value, Stress Management/ Unblocking past hurts or Weight Management/ Skin Session.

Next week we’ll also be sharing some of our big changes for the focus of the business for this coming day.
Stay tuned!

Don’t Miss Me At The Best You Expo

New Year, New You & Of Course New Me!

Hi there!
There is something about timing and the ideal time to start things anew with mobilised energy and the right kind of attitude! You tend to start a diet on Monday; improve your grades, as a student, from September; and you change your life starting from the 1st of January! There’s just something about the energy of the New Year that gets you started right! 
Somehow these little constructed “starts” work as a stimulus for the individual to finally act on whatever they’ve been putting off changing until now and to push oneself towards improving. Of course we all know the truth of age old wise saying: “Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today”. Yet somehow when it comes time for it, we put off anyway. That’s why there’s something about that fresh time of a new year making you feel that opportunity of a fresh start along with it. Hence the popularity of setting New Year’s Resolutions.
What I find most inspiring about these “fresh start moments” is the fact that many of us are on the same page wanting that fresh start opportunity. Hence there’s a collective energy of change and bettering, all moving together towards that better place we all want. 
Therefore I decided that this year I will share with you my 2018 year goals and how I want to direct my life and my service to you and I invite you to share yours with us. If you do, you’ll be entered into a raffle to win a 90 minute Accountability Session and follow up: a new something special that we’re adding for 2018. 
So for the New Year, here are some of the big changes happening with this business.
1) My services are changing! Watch the video below to see how!
2) We have changed our Newsletter format! You can see that here already. 
3) I am changing my Monday Facebook Live from “10 Minutes to Femininity” to “10 Minutes to Healthy Living”. The reason for this change is partly due to my move towards living a healthier life, but mostly because you have asked for it. Time and time again, we’ve been seeing much more interest in our videos to do with health, using natural products, etc. 
I’ve also seen a big move of my clients towards working on issues to do with either self-confidence or weight and often both. Both are covered in “Healthy Living,” which takes a 360 approach to an individual considering her (or his) internal and external health. This includes the stress management, self love and self confidence work which I’ve already been doing, utilising my Coaching, NLP and Hypnotherapy and moves towards more of the Weight Management Hypnotherapy I’ve been doing with my study. And… more that you can see of my goals in my video below.
And later towards the end of winter, in time for the beginning of spring I’m going to invite you all to join me on a special 2 week “Self Care Challenge” where I will invite you to join me in really looking after yourself inside and out for two full weeks (as a start), sharing some quick daily tips with you as how to look after yourself better as I myself share what I’m beginning to do more regularly and have you join me. It will be Two Weeks of Healthy Living, sharing my daily diet and regimen with you to see how it can affect your skin, mood and energy levels. How you look after yourself is how you demonstrate love for yourself so I will be inviting you to join me in this great adventure of healthier living. But for now, Happy New Year. Let’s make 2018 our best year yet!

How to connect to someone special over the holidays

Hey you,

It’s now almost the holiday time and people usually have mixed feeling about these holidays. Those with nice families or someone special to spend the holidays with are excited and looking forward to the special time together. Those for whom the holidays with family brought more drama than positivity, however, may have the opposite experience and may dread this holiday season almost as much as Scrooge once loathed it. I love watching my kids as the buildup to Christmas happens, each day excitedly opening up their Advent Calendars. There’s Chanukah too of course and eight days of celebration to look forward to and enjoy.
I believe that love and relationships is what  ultimately defines our quality of life. This includes any special relationship: be it with that someone special, family, friends, even coworkers. And for happy and meaningful life we need relationships filled with genuine, honest and sometimes embarrassingly open connection. So it doesn’t matter what our previous experiences have been; what matters are the relationships that we create in the present and the future.
Last week, I attended a funeral, an occasion so sad that no words can really describe it… I was saddened for the family, for the friends, the wife and child left behind… This experience really took me to a reflective place, elevating my sense of gratitude for everything that I have and the wonderful connections that I’ve made up to now. Tragic moments like these, have great invisible power to awaken us to the relationships we have in our life in the same way that this holiday season helps us see where the holes or bricks stand.
It’s times like these when we remember all the dear friends and family members we could have paid more attention to and who we let slip out of our lives because other things just got in the way. I also felt infinitely grateful for everyone with whom I shared great memories filled with connection. Unfortunately human nature means sometimes only realising what we had once it’s gone. There is only one thing we can do to remedy this: from time to time take the attention  away from our self-involved lives and spend more of it connecting with people around. This holiday season is an ideal opportunity for us to practice this.
So whichever of the two camps you sit in when it comes to the holidays — whether you dread them or you love and look forward to them — this is your opportunity to really open yourself up to connect with either someone special or with someone new who could become special, to connect with family and to reach out to friends and even improve that friendship.
Let’s allow these annual holidays and these festivities to remind us just how many connections we already have and just how special they are! Let us remember just how blessed we are even to be able to choose whether or not to celebrate when there are so many out there living in other parts of the world who even don’t have this choice to make.
I have a piece of advice for both camps, because I find that no matter whether you love the holidays or dread them there is always room for improvement (especially for those who find it stressful during this time). The very simple secret in improving your festivity experience lies in connecting fully to those around you.
I find that the combination of the following 3 things can work as the baby steps towards more positive and fulfilling connections.
1. Bring your best foot forward and be mentally and physically ready for Connection. This will take some perseverance, however, it is proven that any success one achieves, first and foremost comes from the desire to achieve it. If you truly see the necessity to connect to someone just be ready for it mentally. It means, yes that you might have to be more attentive and more tactile than you’re used to, but sometimes it’s precisely that getting out of our own comfort zone that makes the biggest difference.
2. Be brave and take advantage of opportunities. The most fun I usually end up having when at first I really didn’t feel like going somewhere. We have a tendency to presuppose how an event will unravel, predicting that we will or won’t enjoy like it. E.g. “aaah I know, I have to smalltalk to all these boring people I do not really find interesting “ or “aaah I just get so shy with these people”, or “I feel rather depressed, not in the to talk to anyone; its better for everyone if I just don’t go”. We presuppose, without giving the situation a chance, that it won’t be good and we talk ourselves out of even trying it. This means that if we do go, instead of coming with our best foot forward we sabotage ourselves even before we arrive. What you can do instead is the opposite. Instead of creating a negative outcome for the situation to come, we can create a positive one. Say yes to an invite (a party) and spend time imagining how great the party will be and how many wonderful people we’re likely to meet there. Then arrive with anticipation always looking for the positive that we seek.
3. Open up to people and be interested in them. Its people after all who create our word and who make it a better or worse place. The more interest you show in people, the more interesting things you’ll learn from them. If you are the kind of person who really stresses about social events and interactions, try to spend less time thinking of how others are reacting to you and instead spend time getting to know others by demonstrating genuine interest in them and asking questions that encourage them to open up about themselves. It may help to bring a friend on a similar mission so that you have someone to help you remain brave with you.
And if you feel like nobody wants to talk to you, just get over yourself and try chatting to any one person who looks friendly enough or alone enough to approach. That conversation will make you brave and will pave the way for another and another. Trust me, I’ve gone to many parties and events on my own where I know absolutely no one and these are often the ones where I met the most or the best people.
There is probably quite a lot more that I can say on the subject, but I’ll leave it for another time. Tune in for my Connection Series on my Facebook page @coachjuliakeller for many more tips on connecting and of course to my blog for upcoming videos on connecting over the holidays. My online series “Attract Authentic Love” also has a whole process teaching you how to connect and is now on the Christmas special so you can purchase it for less. And if you have more questions you can always book a free call with me here or contact us on any of our social media below.

Schedule a free call with me

Princess Dreams do come true & yours can too

If you have been looking for your Prince but have found yourself only kissing frogs, take heed and read on…
Even if you’ve been living under a rock the last couple of weeks, if you’re at all romantically minded, you would have noticed the news about the latest “notorious engagement” between England’s beloved Prince Harry and the American actress Meghan Markle. What makes this engagement particularly interesting to us today is the complete non-traditional nature of it. Not only is Meghan not British, not from the same society or background as Harry, but she is also a few years his senior and of a different race and skin colour. This is precisely why she has all of us hopeless romantics rooting for her!
The thing about watching a complete royal outsider on her way to becoming the next English Princess is that it makes us feel that we too can hope for something similarly amazing and miraculous. In truth, most of my clients don’t come with dreams of becoming a princess or even of marrying a prince. Mostly they just come with the hope of meeting someone who will even occasionally make them feel loved, cherished and princess like.
In truth, I myself never had any desires towards joining the royalty; but I do expect my leading man to treat me like his princess. And it is precisely just the fact of this expectation that leads me to always choose leading men who behave in a princely (aka: gentlemanly) fashion and who cherish, adore and spoil me. After all, I believe I deserve it and I treat myself with this kind of love as well — always taking care of my body, my health and my spirit — so I teach them by my own actions what is acceptable. To those who behave as I believe I deserve, I demonstrate my gratitude and appreciation by giving all of me (after all, a relationship means giving back as well as being able to accept with gratitude and appreciation). Because I prefer to be alone than with someone who treats me worse than I deserve, I am rarely if ever disappointed. After all, if you know that you deserve better leaving a less than adequate relationship should not be a challenge.
We are all worthy and deserving of finding our own unique “prince” who treats us like the “princess” we deserve to be. If you’ve been struggling to meet anyone who even comes close to being that special someone, perhaps it’s because you’re going about it the wrong way. Or possibly it’s because you yourself don’t believe that you are truly worthy of being a Princess. That’s why all of the work I do with clients begins with growing your self-value and your self-appreciation. That doesn’t mean that you have to be a perfectly finished product before you’re able to meet the person of your dreams (after all, we are all works in progress), but it does mean that you have to value yourself before you can expect anyone else to value you (and that includes your friends, your family and even your boss, along with that special someone).
So if you need help with this, you’ll be pleased to discover that both my book  and my online program  begin with that before moving onto specifics of how to help you meet your dream love. Have questions? Schedule your free 30 minute phone call here.
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Workshop for men only: Man Up & Get The Woman You Want

Hey you,
Some months ago I ran a workshop at a private members’ club about attracting love into your life. Normally when I run these workshops, I am aim them towards women, as I began what I do working uniquely with women, and especially focusing on femininity. This time, however, when the organizer asked me if the workshop was for women only, I replied that I guessed both could come, not anticipating much interest from men on this topic.
To my surprise, however, the room was packed with men!. In fact, about 60% of the participants were men. I was shocked, and, to be honest, more than a little unprepared for such a turnout. I’d had a program for women lined up from the workshop; but I had absolutely nothing at all to offer to men at that point. Truthfully, I’d considered creating a workshop geared towards men, and I even had a title for it; but I hadn’t yet put it together or even considered the details of it.
At first I was nervous, wondering how the dynamics would be in this mixed talk. Apart from the big talks I spoke at for various events, like the Best You and the Mind Body Spirit festival, most of my smaller, more intimate talks were geared specifically towards women. But a few minutes into the workshop, I realised that I had nothing to worry about. Both men and women spoke openly about their issues in the dating world and actually helped to answer each other’s questions. Above all, I realised very quickly that men were just as confused and unhappy with the dating scene as women were and that both sexes were suffering from that same disappointment in their inability to make anything significant happen with the person they actually wanted to be with (or possibly even to meet this special person). Despite the fact that the energy in the room was great, I was saddened by the fact that both sexes somehow were suffering in the same way but still were unable to truly connect with each other. Something definitely had to be done and I wanted very much to help them.
Afterwards, I had a chance to chat to these wonderful men who I met during the workshop and to truly investigate what is it that men felt they needed help with when searching for love and what were the biggest obstacles they felt that they needed help and advice to tackle. After speaking with them, it became very clear that a workshop for men is definitely necessary as they certainly had quite a few questions about us women. Hence the upcoming workshop for men only “Man Up & Get The Woman You Want!” coming up in February. I am sending this newsletter to all of my mailing list, and not just men, because if you lovely ladies have some great guys you know who could use a few tips of how to be more successful with women, this workshop could be ideal for them, so please do spread the word.

For more information click here

A reason why gluttony is one of the deadly sins

Some time ago I was forced to change my diet – radically. I have never been a junk food addict, and I stay far away from sugary fizzy water that pretends to be a drink. But I have to admit that even I was combatting my own urges of crisps and a good dessert from now and then. But the main reason that I watched my diet then was to avoid weight gain. Knowing better what I needed in my life than even I do, as the universe always does, it sent me a health problem that opened my eyes not only to my own occasionally harmful habits, but to an entirely another sea of problems that threaten the well being of so many: food addiction – or rather society’s overall predilection towards food (and drink) that is temporarily filling and tasty, but that actually is really not good for you. What does any of this have to do with love coaching, you may ask? Actually, loads. It has become a common issue among my clients that a malnourished heart often leads to the abuse of food and that, in return, this lack of care for their body (and skin) then leads to them looking worse, which then heightens their sense of worthlessness.

Hello my dearest Geminis,

I have to admit that I have, at times, been somewhat dismissive of the issue, thinking that overeating was a simply due to the lack of a strong will; in my own life, I have very much used “mind over manner” to accomplish so many goals that I didn’t always understand why others also couldn’t do the same. This changed, however, when I began to think deeper and to observe people around me soon realising that it was not only overeating that was an issue but also unhealthy eating habits developed partially due to lack of education of what the right foods to eat are, and partially due to a lack of willpower to stick to regimes that initially are difficult and showcase little value. I began to explore the reasoning behind the various attitudes towards the food we eat.

The truth is, I consider myself rather a “foodie” and I too find great pleasure in food that tastes great. Often food habits are created because of the seeking of great flavours (as was in my case) and an uneducated palate may find those flavours in foods that are more manufactured than true. Hey I too once loved McDonald’s. And even now when I write, the thought of a McDonald’s Big Mac still makes me salivate a bit. But I also now know exactly what I’m ingesting when I allow myself to eat it and how harmful that one Big Mac is to my skin, my waistline, my energy level, etc. But I may still choose to eat that Big Mac that one time I’m on a highway and McDonald’s is that one place at the rest area; and I will probably even enjoy it. The idea is to know what is in the food we eat and how it will affect us and our bodies and to make choices based on being informed about that food. The idea is also to let ourselves savour our food and enjoy how it tastes, smells and feels afterwards and to use food as nourishment and even pleasure; not as a way to stuff ourselves or to drown our woes.

Food and eating is not a substitute for internal happiness. It is a source of pleasure, of course; but there are other sources of pleasure too: reading, watching a film, making love, hanging out with friends, taking long walks, exercise and so many more interesting ways to occupy our time. The issue with food today is that often we don’t actually know what we’re eating, even if we think we do, so what we seem to like as flavours to make our food tasty is sometimes (especially with highly-processed food) actually causing our body short and long-term harm. It is no surprise, therefore, that so many modern-day diseases actually have their roots in poor diet or lifestyle choices.

The deeper I searched the more I realised that the junk food addiction and over-eating issue has deeper roots than simply trying to fill an enlarged stomach. After all, gluttony is one the seven deadliest sins, and not because it makes you fat but because it kills your livelihood. Gluttony is not about eating bad food but is rather about getting addicted to it to such an extent that it dulls your senses and mind and stops you from focusing on more important areas of life. The overeating not only has immediate physical effects (we have all experienced a dinner party after which even breathing seems hard because we just ate way too much), but that intake of excess substances (which nowadays we don’t always know what they contain) dulls our mind and saps our energy as well. The internal hole that we are trying to fill with food will never be able to be filled with this food. But the added chemicals and our own depleted sense of happiness keeps us going back to it, as it is more accessible and easier to get than the actual sense of happiness that we crave. It is the easy solution. Therefore I deiced to to really work on it, understand the issue, having seen how overeating and also being unhappy with one’s physical appearance affects one’s love life, I now offer, as one of my services for those who need it, hypnotherapy for weight management (which of course includes looking into eating better and finding other sources of happiness).

If you want to schedule a hypnotherapy for weight management session book a call to discuss the particulars below.

Book a call with meHello my dearest Geminis,

My new program for £49 only plus a surprise!!

Have you had that nagging feeling that your love life just seems to be not how you imagined it should be and it’s starting to weigh down on you? Have you thought about wanting to change your life to finally have the kids of love situation that makes you wake up each morning smiling?

Maybe, though you know how different and better you want it to be, it seems that everytime you think of doing something about it, a million other things start to happen and changing your life for the better gets buried under so many other obligations and bits and piece that seem to need to be dealt with first.

Well, if you believe in signs, then take this as one. This friday is Black Friday and I am, for the first time ever (and possibly the last), joining the many other businesses with a Black Friday special offering just for you! Even though we just recently launched the Attract Authentic Love online product this month (normally valued at £199) for 72 hours only (until midnight this Sunday) you can buy this program for just £49! That is by far the most incredible offer ever!

But that’s not all! I’m also offering (literally only until Sunday) a 20% discount on my Love Blueprint Session and my coaching packages. To find out more book a call with me here.

Remember to take advantage of this amazing offer before Sunday! There’s also a very special added gift for the first 20 to take advantage of this offer (your first gift for Christmas). To find out more click here.

Traditional values are still the healthiest

Hi there,

If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ve probably heard me speak about traditional  values with a modern twist quite a lot. So what does it mean exactly?

Well what I mean by traditional values with a modern twist are values that consider marriage as something that relationships can potentially develop towards. These values also believe that women are stronger by allowing themselves to be feminine, empowering their man to be a better man for her by being feminine in his presence and by encouraging him softly, sensually, and warmly to treat them how they want to be treated (no nagging necessary); while men should allow themselves to be gentlemen who lead and who protect and provide for the woman they feel for, while also treating her with respect and caring.

The idea behind these values is to move towards a focus on valuing oneself, actually connecting with someone special for real, so that it lasts long-term and to move away from meaningless very short-term passing relationships. If we take tradtional values to be marriage, self preservation, femininity and feeling good long-term, then I stand for all of these because this kind of relationship is the healthiest and will have us be the healthiest within it.

It’s true that marriage as an institution has changed. The other day I watched Esther Perel’s talk on “the secret to desire in a long term relationship” as she articulated very well just how the modern day marriage has become what a whole village used to be for a wife. Let me explain, while in the past marriage was an economic arrangement, either agreed by the parents of the couple to wed or chosen as the most suitable prospect without really knowing the person, actual love was to be sought elsewhere. Basically, the husband and wife relationship was that of honour and respect a  father to her children type of situation, while a best friend, your secret keeper, your partner in crime, your sexual lover, your soulmate, your sense of belonging had to be looked for elsewhere.

In the past each and every single role was acted out by a number of different people: your maid might have been your secret keeper, your close friend your partner in crime, the experience of love was most likely sought with another lover and real passion might have remained in a never fulfilled relationship of distant eye flirting with the writer of the village.

Modern day marriage, however, has us entering into huge expectations of what we’d like our ideal spouse to be for us, and they are expectations which are truly difficult to fulfill fully. We now want to take all of these things and put them into one person and share that for the rest of our lives: our spouse now has to be our best friend, our ideal sexual partner, our soulmate, the person who makes us grow, the person who gives us identity, the person who shares our values, the person who will make us be the best version of ourselves and the person who will go crazy for us till death do us part. Yes, marriage has become very hard BECAUSE we invest and expect so much from our spouse. We invest not only financial stability, we invest totality of our being and above all our identity and livelihood.

Therefore when marriages crash we feel that we crashed with them!

You might be wondering whats the positive of this rather bleak development of a marriage? Well, as we know the positives are plenty! Though the expectations are raised significantly, so has the reward. Marriages today are actually built (at least in the majority of the free world) on love and camaraderie. Rather than just having our spouse play one role in our lives, we actually WANT this person to be someone we spend time with and get to know. Sexuality within a marriage has overall improved as well. The safety of the marriage commitment should allow us to be more open and free with one another. Honesty within marriage (though not always the case as we know) is something most of us hope and strive for.

We have finally realised that what makes life worth living and what gives it meaning is love: love for the other person, love for ourselves, love for our work (something most of us want to develop), love for our children and love for our friends and family and those we allow close to our hearts. Love requires authenticity. In order to allow ourselves to love freely we must first be honest with our hearts to understand who we are and what we feel. We have reached a stage of what 20th century existential philosophers spent most of their time talking about: a stage of demanding and understanding the value of authenticity.

Authenticity brings dignity to oneself and life lived in a dignified manner brings meaning and value. Thats is why I argue for the benefit of marriage as it can result in that dignified life. My definition of marriage is that of a modern understanding: demanding all of these things to be in one person, struggle through them together and no matter how hard and complex it might get, simply be honest with one another.

I would love to hear your views on marriage. What do you think makes it work? Do you have any good examples? Please share with us on our social media below.

And if you want to Attract Authentic Love into your life, sign up for our self study program here or book a free 30 minute call with Julia to discuss how she can help you to write your ideal love story.

You can watch Esther’s talk here:

From Journey To Destination

Hey there!

Lately, I’ve been speaking quite a bit about my Attract Authentic Love Self Study Program, which officially launched this Sunday. But there’s a good reason for this: like with the writing of my Attract Authentic Love book, it’s been a big journey for me to create it and I have learned so much from this journey.

Stay tuned as next week I shall tell you about why traditional values in the modern day world still work, but for this week I want to use the opportunity to disclose to you, in full honesty, why I think we need such programs to be more available for women and how I came to create this. After reading the article, you can get even more insight into the program by watching the video below.

I began my career as a Love Coach for women only because it was my first passion to help women to truly value themselves and to expect others to treat them with value and respect. It’s still incredible to me that women who are amazing tend to undervalue themselves, while most men actually overvalue themselves. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying that men should value themselves less, but simply that we as women need to learn to value ourselves better and to be treated with value and respect. That said, I also believe very strongly that we benefit from allowing ourselves to be feminine and to tap into our natural sensuality.

Hence, I believe that women can be both feminine and assertive and that assertiveness and strength (and expecting to be treated with value and respect) does not mean acting masculine and sacrificing what is naturally so beautiful about being a woman: our femininity. In fact, it is in allowing ourselves to tap into who we really are where we feel best about ourselves. And that is the idea behind this program: to help women to realise just how incredible and special each and every single one of us really is and to teach you to show that to the world and to approach the world of love knowing and expecting that your special someone is going to discover how amazing you really are and love you for it.

I like you once stood in a completely different place, in a totally different frame of mind, and at a crossroads. I had enough bad dates and disappointments, after my divorce, to have given up completely on love, but something deep inside told me to keep going, and there came a crisis moment of almost breaking, after which everything changed. I know that if I could change my frames of mind and my life with it — if  I could wake up in the morning and feel good amidst a series of bad life situations surrounding me — then anyone could! 

And the big secret is that when you change your mind, your whole life changes with it! Today, my life is incredible and I am grateful for every moment, even the less desired ones of difficulty and pain that still come (as for everyone). But today I know that every obstacle has a reason and a path of learning to take with it, and so I welcome it as it signifies that I’m on the right path.

What I want to do with this program is to simply help spread the word that a HAPPY AND FULL LIFE IS POSSIBLE!  You don’t have to choose to find it through work with me, but you should choose to be happy and to pursue that happiness whichever way speaks to you! Remember that finding fulfilling love and living a fulfilling life IS A CHOICE and you make a choice to move towards or away from it every day.

More often that not, what troubles women the most is that coming helpless hopelessness: that loss of hope of ever finding that special someone who will see them as special too and who will adore them for who they truly are. Often, the hopelessness comes from not knowing what to do to change their set of circumstances. That’s why I created this program: to help you to change your circumstances so that you too can be one half of that ideal pair you watch strolling together looking happily in love. I see many women who have completely lost hope in ever feeling loved and finding love that they succumb to the a life that they believe a single woman has to live, but which leaves them feeling lonely. I also see women who obviously keep dreaming of finding a perfect match that is always somehow just that bit out of reach that time passes them by while they linger in bitter disappointment. 

Since I’ve worked with both kinds of women, I know that feeling of misery and despair is a friend to both categories … and unfortunately because they stay in it and don’t change their circumstances, they invariably choose to be as unhappy as they are. They can blame their ex-partners for the pain they’ve caused them, their parents for making them feel alienated or unloved, their friends for overshadowing them, their looks, their weight, etc… The truth is that if you want to put the fault for living a life you don’t love on someone or something else, it’s always easy to find an object of blame. But it is only when you take full responsibility for your actions and your life that you can truly choose to change it.

So here is what I hope for you: what I want to happen is simple — I want once unhappy women who have become happy to tell other unhappy women that happiness is possible and is reachable and to inspire them to take responsibility for their lives and start acting!

And here’s what I’m offering: Because I really believe in this mission to help women to value themselves and to find true love, I’m going to extend my pre-launch price for another week so that you can still take advantage of the incredible 50% price discount which will be disappearing very soon. So if you want to truly CHANGE YOUR LIFE AND FIND TRUE LOVE, click here.

ATTRACT AUTHENTIC LOVE program launching on Sunday!!!

Hi there,
Have you ever felt frustrated that you just can’t seem to meet someone you really like?
Well five years ago that was me? Recently divorced and a single mom, I’d just had the worst dating year of my life. The men I wanted were either nowhere to be found or not interested in me. The men who did show interest (who I have to admit I gave a chance to occasionally in my desperation) were as far as possible from who I actually imagined myself being with. I was stuck and I felt stuck.
Then in what seemed like a quick moment, everything changed. Fast forward several years and I have my choice of wonderful, brilliant men who I could choose between. Though I am still a single mom and still divorced, and even though I am actually older, I am suddenly the owner of my own love journey and suddenly the journey is an exciting one filled with passion and adventure.
So what did I do to get here? Well it’s all detailed for you in my “Attract Authentic Love” self-study program which will be launching this Sunday. But if you want to be one of the final few to still benefit from my pre-launch price (a savings of £100 off the post-launch price), you can book by this Sunday.
If you want more information or have any questions, you can schedule a free 30 minute call with me here. Or you can read more about the program and purchase it at the pre-launch price here.
Here’s my video telling you a bit more about the program and how I created it.

Want to meet someone who shares your life view?

Do you sometimes feel that though you occasionally do meet people who are ok, you struggle to meet that one special person who actually shares your outlook on life? Maybe the people you meet just look at the world differently? Or maybe you feel that not one of them really “gets you” as you think differently.

This past weekend I spoke and exhibited at the Mind Body Soul conference and Yoga Show at Alexandra Palace. It was an amazing weekend filled with so many different people all there with a parallel higher life purpose and mission to meet others of a similar mindset. I presented a talk called “Find love at any age in three proven steps”. For those who couldn’t be there, you can catch a small glimpse of the talk on our Facebook page: www.facebook.com/coachjuliakeller.

During and after the talk many of those who came asked me just that question: how can they find that special someone who shares their world view and outlook on life? During the event, many women and men came to me to discuss that exact struggle. It is clear that in today’s society, we are more likely to search, and less likely to find, that person who really and truly suits us: that real authentic love. So does that mean we’re doomed to either settle or roam the world alone?

Well, as someone tuned into the world of love at all levels, I am constantly looking for examples of success in relationships. So I took the opportunity of the Mind Body Soul event to conduct some personal research of my own and I spoke to some incredible couples who were together and who were in fact on that same life journey together. So how did they find one another and end up together? Well that will be the subject of one of my upcoming events, and an upcoming free YouTube video with some tips of how you too can find that person who shares your life path, so stay tuned. In order to see these videos first, subscribe to our YouTube channel (for free), by clicking the link here
And if you are ready to Attract Authentic Love into your life right now, you can still sign up for my 6 week self study program at the special pre-launch price (of a savings of £100) until our launch in early November. Hurry as this special offer is only available for a short while longer…

Check out the Self Study Program

The  Attract Authentic Love Program Launching In

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In case you missed last week’s newsletter,  you can watch the video here
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What’s keeping you single?

Have you ever wondered if there’s something you’re doing that’s keeping you single?

Well five years ago that was me? Recently divorced and a single mom, I’d just had the worst dating year of my life. The men I wanted were either nowhere to be found or not interested in me. The men that showed interest (who I have to admit I gave a chance to occasionally in my desperation) were as far as possible from who I actually imagined myself being with. I was stuck and I felt stuck.

Then in what seemed like a quick moment, everything changed. Fast forward several years and I had my choice of wonderful, brilliant men who I could choose between. Though I was still a single mom and still divorced, and even though I was actually older, I was suddenly the owner of my own love journey and suddenly the journey was an exciting one filled with passion and adventure.

So what did I do to get there? Well it’s all detailed for you in my “Attract Authentic Love” self-study program which will be launched next month. But if you don’t want to wait until then, you could be one of the early Love life changers chosen to beta test this incredible six week program and at an incredible savings of £200 off the launch price!

If you want more information or have any questions, you can schedule a free 30 minute call with me here. Or you can read more about the program and purchase it at the intro price here.

Oh and if you want to find out what you’re doing wrong that maybe is keeping you single, read this article that Cosmopolitan asked me to write with the top “5 reasons why you haven’t found the one yet”:

Are you choosing the “Highest Bidder” rather than waiting for the “Right Bidder”?

Are you choosing the “highest bidder” rather than waiting for the “right bidder”?

In last week’s newsletter (you can read it again here if you missed it) I spoke about an attitude that some women, who often find themselves alone, have that I call “going for Mr. Impossible”. In a nutshell, I explained how searching for Mr. Impossible can sometimes be a defense mechanism saving you from getting hurt in a relationship by avoiding getting close to anyone or getting into a relationship at all. These women prefer to avoid relationships rather than to risk being hurt.

On the other side of the coin are women who want to avoid being alone at all costs and so constantly find themselves selling themselves short. These women prefer to be with anyone who chooses them rather than risk being alone. If you find yourself constantly jumping in and out of relationships, but rarely staying in any for long, you may be guilty of constantly going for the highest bidder rather than taking the time to wait for the right bidder to come along.

There are different reasons why we choose to jump from relationship to relationship, rather than choosing to wait for the right person to come along and I explain this further, as well as how to change it, in the video below. The issue often boils down to us undervaluing ourselves and to being afraid that the person we really want to be with is either not out there or won’t ever come along. So, rather than having faith and believing that we can meet the one we want, we accept the best one of those who want us.

While that may sound reasonable, what it leads to is the “Runaway Bride” type of relationship (named for the Julia Roberts & Richard Gere followup film to “Pretty Woman”) where we start out excited about the person we’re with and the new relationship only to soon grow disillusioned and disappointed when we realize that the person doesn’t quite live up to the expectations that we had of him. This constant accepting of the highest bidder then becomes a pattern that we follow regularly, constantly finding ourselves disappointed with the man we are with because he isn’t really what we want. Unfortunately it also means that we hurt quite a lot of men in the process and rarely end up waiting for the one we really want as we’re constantly settling for the “good enough for now” version.

So is this better than being alone? The problem with this attitude is of course that we devalue ourselves neglecting to take the necessary time to understand what we really seek and to find the relationship that is a truly good long-term fit for us.

Watch my video below, how I explain this phenomenon, and what I suggest you can do to change it. If this resonates with you, schedule a free 30 min call with me to discuss your patterns and how to break them.

Searching For Mr.Impossible? Why that’ll leave you lonely and how to retune your picker.

Do you sometimes feel that the man you’re looking for just isn’t out there? Do you find yourself constantly disappointed on dates because no man seems to measure up to what you’re after? Well the problem could be you and what you’re after. As a Love Coach, I meet many women who are searching for what one of my clients coined as “Mr Impossible” – in other words, the man who doesn’t actually exist. Sometimes, this tendency is due to what these days seems like the “something always better around the corner” epidemic caused by dating apps that make you feel like there are always loads of easy options, thereby leading us never to be happy with the one we have. I too have been known to be guilty of this from time to time. From my observation, however, searching for Mr Impossible can also be due to the fear of actually finding someone and having to make it work. I know it’s a strange fear, but not an uncommon one in this society where many of us tend to be overly perfectionistic (so why not be perfectionist about looking for a partner as well).

Think about it – searching for Mr Impossible creates the illusion that you are so much more amazing that most men are worthy of and allows you to believe yourself to be unlucky never to find your suitable soul mate. It allows you to place yourself higher giving you a reason to avoid actually opening up to someone, really getting to know them, and possibly giving a relationship a try. Opening up to someone and letting them get to know you enough to hurt you is scary after all. What if they don’t like you and end up rejecting you? Allowing yourself to feel something for someone is one of the most frightening and most exciting things you can do after all. Nothing compares to the adventure of falling in love, and the ups and downs that could potentially go along with that adventure could be truly frightening. Taking a chance of a relationship that may work or may fail is placing yourself in a vulnerable position, which your subconscious might be telling you is not a good idea out of fear. You might think you really want love, and you feel lonely and the desire is honest, but the fear is honest too and fear has amazing ability to take away the power of your decision making. On the positive side, by realising that you are keeping yourself lonely out of fear, and taking ownership of this, you have the power to change it.

Once you take ownership of your fear, and of the role you are playing in your loneliness, you actually empower yourself to make the dramatic changes required to make a huge difference in your personal life. To learn how to step out of “Searching for Mr Impossible” syndrome, watch the video here.

Ready to find Mr Right and to stop searching for Mr Impossible, and feel you need some help in figuring out how? My new Self-Study Program will take you through the proven Three Step Process to Attract Authentic Love into your life. Want to get the program at an incredible low pre-launch price? Click here to book even before we launch! Feel that you need more personalized help throughout the process? Click here to book a 30 minute call with Julia to discuss how she can help you with your specific issue.

Volunteer For My Hypnotherapy Project!

Hey you,

Do you feel stuck in a negative eating pattern and unsure how to change it? Do you wish that you can be healthier and look after yourself better but unsure where and how to begin? Is your self esteem affected by a negative self-image that you wish you can change? Do you believe your life would be much better if you only looked different or had a different figure or body type?

Well if you thought “yes” to any of these questions, take comfort in the fact that you are not alone. Many people, especially women, suffer from lack of self confidence — in one way or another — and very often related to self-image. One of the most prominent reasons for low self esteem and poor self image is connected to your feelings about your body, your figure, or your weight.

Many of my clients, for instance, turn to food for comfort after a bad day or when feeling lonely and then feel bad about it afterwards as they watch their efforts at controlling their weight deteriorate. “What can one harmless piece of chocolate do with my beloved cup of coffee,” they tell themselves at the moment. Or something like, “So what if I make it a junk food day today, I deserve it after the crapy day I’ve had”! Or how about, “I’ve been exercising for ages but still haven’t lost any weight, so screw it, I’m having a bowl of pasta”. And there are many more. Does this resonate? From my experience, many people (women especially) turn to food to temporarily suffocate feelings of loneliness and unhappiness.

Unfortunately, clever advertising has caught onto this tendency and is using it against us for the benefit of raising sales of well-known food vendors. The significant rise in vendors means that we are constantly bombarded with advertising telling us that we will feel good if we just eat or drink some product or other. This makes resisting temptation that much more difficult and challenging on a regular basis (even if also more worthwhile). While some 20-30 years ago there was one big chocolate brand advertising its’ scrumptious happiness-giving chocolate, these days we have to endure over a dozen different chocolate brands trying to sell us their product in the most attractive way, normally using our lack of willpower against us to lure us to purchase their product. And let’s not forget the other unhealthy temptations, such as junk food, fast food, soda, coffee, alcohol, etc.

The desire for our purchase has now become a battleground where we have to fight temptation constantly in order to keep our figures and maintain our ideal weight without getting lured into wasting money on so many easily-available unhealthy options. When you pass Starbucks and feel proud resisting that amazing chocolate frappe, a few steps further you encounter Nero’s, Costa, Pret a Manger, McDonald’s… Sometimes, if your willpower and your reason for fighting isn’t strong enough, the battle of resistance becomes too tiring and it’s easier to give in than to hold out… even if that means setting yourself back in your body image goals and feeling terrible about yourself afterwards.

I too have undergone this battle many times in my life and I also know how bad it feels to lose and how good it feels to win. All of my work as a Love Coach begins with helping clients to love themselves better and to feel empowered enough to achieve the life and love situation that they really want. Because I am passionate about helping my clients on the deepest levels, and because I am constantly pursuing learning better and better ways to do this, I embarked on a course to study Hypnotherapy: the fastest method to work with nốt just the conscious mind, but also the subconscious one. Very quickly I saw that weight management and confidence and self-esteem work were areas most crucial to a vast majority of my clients, even before they were ready to find love.

For this reason, I’ve decided to focus on those areas specifically for my hypnotherapy certification project, to run a project tackling precisely this issue of how a negative body image can adversely affect our self esteem. I already use hypnotherapy and NLP successfully to help my clients to improve their self confidence and now I am beginning to use it to help clients with weight management, thereby significantly improving their self esteem as their outwardly image improves. Hypnotherapy is not magic (though the results my clients have seen have often been quite magical); it is simply a method of rewiring your brain to break the old and unhealthy habits and to exchange them for the healthy habits that you actually want and that really serve you.

At the moment, I’m looking for 2-3 more clients who want help to reach their ideal weight, figure, or size to participate in my study looking to demonstrate a parallel between feeling better about yourself physically (by being closer to your physical ideal), when you like the way you look better, and feeling better about yourself overall, thereby having a better self-confidence. If you would like to be one of these few clients participating, schedule a free call with me here to discuss if you are appropriate for this study.

Is Sex Without Love Enough?

Is sex without love enough?

One of the questions I often get from women when they find out that I’m a Love Coach is around the issue of how long to wait to have sex with a man they’re seeing. Some of them, disappointed with the dating scene and feeling desire to be intimate, rush into sex in order to meet their “needs” only to feel not so great after.

Recently, a client of mine shared an experience with me. To get over a man that she was still hung up on, she decided to indulge freely in a one night stand rather than try and wait for the “right guy” to come along again. This came about naturally as she met a friend of a friend at a party. Initially, she didn’t pay much attention to him as he was not “her typical type”. He was fun and attractive, but he was more of a “party guy” and not someone in a place to have the serious relationship that she was looking for before, so she would never have considered having something serious with him. However, after hanging out with their common friends for a while, the two ended up having some sexy, playful dancing that then led to sex. Rather than holding herself back as she normally would, she decided to “go for it” which was out of character for her and she had an amazing night of sex. At that moment, she didn’t find it awkward or immoral; she just wanted to have pleasure. She also didn’t expect anything from this man (or so she told herself) so she wouldn’t be disappointed if he didn’t contact her the next day.

While I have heard enough stories of women who are confident having amazing sex, without commitment, very early on with a man, and it turning into something serious eventually; I have heard too many more of the other kind of stories: those of women being hurt by the man’s lack of contact following sex that came too quickly. Hence, I normally advise my clients to wait for sex until they are in a committed, monogamous relationship. Believe me, I know the pull of hormones and how desire can make one want to rush into physical contact. I also know how good sex can feel with the right person as well as how bad it can feel when that right person forgets you exist the morning after. I have had more than enough clients and friends crying to me at sessions following being hurt due to rushing too quickly into sex to recommend “no sex without commitment” as a regular policy.

I know that we live in modern times, and I get how the sexual revolution makes women want to exert our sexual independence. However, women and men feel sex differently and, unfortunately, the double-standard still exists without being clearly admitted to. Recently, I questioned a small number of men about their thoughts on women who go for sex quickly. Their responses were candid and telling. Some were almost too candid: “I would never take a woman who sleeps with me too quickly seriously, even if I was the one initiating the sex. She should say no.” I know, I cringed too when I heard it, but the other men in the group corroborated that as unfair and sexist as this may be, it also happens to be mainly true. There are certain exceptions made for some pretty amazing women and in some special circumstances, but we can’t count on being an exception. What we can count on is following a rule.

The reason I stick so firmly to “no sex without commitment” is because it is a policy that not only is better for your health (do you really want to let someone you barely know into your home or your body?) and for your self-esteem (how will you really feel when he doesn’t even try to contact you the next day), but it also serves as a wonderful filter. That man who won’t be ok with waiting for you to get to know him better before being intimate with you was probably never that serious about being with you anyway. Sex also feels much better when had with someone you have strong feelings for, and when you know that that someone is “doing the deed” only with you.

So, my advice: have patience, wait, date, get to know the men you’re interested in and choose one you want to know better. If you want help meeting someone special or becoming the “Chooser” in your love story, or in finding out how to turn his desire for sex into the ideal Segway into a very cool and non-threatening conversation about commitment, book a free 30 minute call with me on this link. Ask about my one to one coaching and my soon to be launching self-study program at a fraction of the cost of one to one coaching. Also ask about my Elite package that takes you through all you need to be totally and completely “Love ready”

5 reasons you have not found the one (and what to do about it)

Are you thinking that’s a rather bold title? Well it’s the title of my recent article for the Cosmopolitan online magazine. In my career of love coaching I have developed a habit, which now has become a skill, to observe and narrow down the problems faced by my clients looking for love to some key issues as to why they have, up to now, been unable to find that love.

In this Cosmopolitan article, I pick the 5 most common patterns that work as hurdles for women to getting that love life that they want and give some quick fixes as to how to change this.

I’m sure you’ll have plenty of questions after reading this article, as well as a renewed desire to find that love you crave, so I’m soon to offer you more ways to get those questions answered.

First of all, you can find many answers in my book “Attract Authentic Love”, (here is the link to get it on Amazon) which highlights the three proven steps I use with many clients to bring that ideal love into their lives. You can also get some insight into how I work with clients on a one to one basis by booking a free call with me on the link below.

And coming very soon, you’ll be able to get many answers at a fraction of the price of my one to one coaching, by using my new self-study program and shortly coming group coaching program as well. Any questions about any of this can be answered by booking a free call with me and stay tuned for special offers available for followers of this mailing list and my social media only.


10 Minutes To Femininity

Btw most Mondays I stream live “10 minutes to femininity”, showing you how it does not take long or much effort to delve into that femininity that makes you more attractive to men. It’s a quick tip video about all the different aspects of femininity, including interviews with some experts. All brought to you live on Facebook on my page @coachjuliakeller. Enjoy and let us know by your comments if there’s anything specific that you’d like us to talk about.