So this is it: the last days of the last month of this year (2015). As always, New Year’s is a time of celebrations, festivities, and the making of resolutions. After all, there is the potential of so many exciting things coming around the corner and in the New Year. But, for many, there is also something that the end of another year gone by that could feel somewhat ominous, especially if we’re not quite where we want to be for that year.
The problem with another year past and you feeling not at all closer to achieving your own love and life goals is that it has the potential of knocking you down and making you feel that achieving what you want is so far away that it almost feels impossible. The problem with that mindset is that we attract the reality that we imagine, even in our worst case scenarios, which often tend to emerge at this ominous time of years ending (yes even among the happy, celebrating faces). Another such pensive time, by the way, when thoughts of “what have I really accomplished with my life up to now?” crawling in as you get older, is the time of the birthday. For my kids, who are still little, both New Year’s and their birthday is an exciting, happy time of celebration that they highly look forward to, just as they look forward to being allowed to stay up past midnight on New Year’s Eve. For most of my coaching clients, at the beginning of their love journey, these two events bring more misery and dread than they do excitement. While my kids are counting down the days to their birthday parties and to Christmas and New Year’s Eve when they have either gifts to unwrap or a party to go to, my clients are trying to figure out how they can avoid the party and maybe sleep through the event altogether to pretend it never even happened.
Many of my clients are faced with families asking them, as they have for years, why they’re still single; or — even worse — not asking anymore as they’d given up years ago. Christmas and New Year’s is a time that can feel especially alone if you’re alone. I know as I remember a Christmas that I spent alone when I’d just finished with a relationship that wasn’t working. It can be a very lonely time for singles. The problem is that my clients (who often come to me around these momentous seasonal occasions) aren’t yet looking at the benefits of the timing itself.
The good thing about times of the year when singles feel more single is that it is actually not just an individual feeling. Everybody’s feeling the same. Other singles are feeling just as lonely and alone as you are. Hence it’s the ideal time for singles to mingle and to meet each other. Plus, Christmas and New Year’s bring with them ample opportunities for meeting others: whether for friendship or for love. This is the time of drunken Christmas parties where everybody is much more inclined to be merry and friendly. So, rather than trying to hide the seasonal time away, take any and every opportunity to be out and about where the other people are. Fight your inclination to say “no thank you” to an invitation to yet another Christmas or New Year’s party or your desire to celebrate on your own in the closed confines of your home, hiding with a box of tissues, a tub of ice cream, and a romantic film. Who will you meet there? The pizza delivery guy? Is that who you want to go out with?
Need help figuring out where to go and what to do? Let me be your guide. Email me to schedule your free half hour session to juliakellercoaching@gmail.com or sign up to my upcoming Irresistible Woman workshops (listed below). Or join me and over 20 other Love Coaches for the Irresistible Woman Summit organised by Nicole Moore to find out some of our free tips on How to be an Irresistible Woman by clicking HERE