Happy New Year 2016! – Let the singles learn to mingle this time around!

So this is it: the last days of the last month of this year (2015). As always, New Year’s is a time of celebrations, festivities, and the making of resolutions. After all, there is the potential of so many exciting things coming around the corner and in the New Year. But, for many, there is also something that the end of another year gone by that could feel somewhat ominous, especially if we’re not quite where we want to be for that year.

The problem with another year past and you feeling not at all closer to achieving your own love and life goals is that it has the potential of knocking you down and making you feel that achieving what you want is so far away that it almost feels impossible. The problem with that mindset is that we attract the reality that we imagine, even in our worst case scenarios, which often tend to emerge at this ominous time of years ending (yes even among the happy, celebrating faces). Another such pensive time, by the way, when thoughts of “what have I really accomplished with my life up to now?” crawling in as you get older, is the time of the birthday. For my kids, who are still little, both New Year’s and their birthday is an exciting, happy time of celebration that they highly look forward to, just as they look forward to being allowed to stay up past midnight on New Year’s Eve. For most of my coaching clients, at the beginning of their love journey, these two events bring more misery and dread than they do excitement. While my kids are counting down the days to their birthday parties and to Christmas and New Year’s Eve when they have either gifts to unwrap or a party to go to, my clients are trying to figure out how they can avoid the party and maybe sleep through the event altogether to pretend it never even happened.

Many of my clients are faced with families asking them, as they have for years, why they’re still single; or — even worse — not asking anymore as they’d given up years ago. Christmas and New Year’s is a time that can feel especially alone if you’re alone. I know as I remember a Christmas that I spent alone when I’d just finished with a relationship that wasn’t working. It can be a very lonely time for singles. The problem is that my clients (who often come to me around these momentous seasonal occasions) aren’t yet looking at the benefits of the timing itself.

The good thing about times of the year when singles feel more single is that it is actually not just an individual feeling. Everybody’s feeling the same. Other singles are feeling just as lonely and alone as you are. Hence it’s the ideal time for singles to mingle and to meet each other. Plus, Christmas and New Year’s bring with them ample opportunities for meeting others: whether for friendship or for love. This is the time of drunken Christmas parties where everybody is much more inclined to be merry and friendly. So, rather than trying to hide the seasonal time away, take any and every opportunity to be out and about where the other people are. Fight your inclination to say “no thank you” to an invitation to yet another Christmas or New Year’s party or your desire to celebrate on your own in the closed confines of your home, hiding with a box of tissues, a tub of ice cream, and a romantic film. Who will you meet there? The pizza delivery guy? Is that who you want to go out with?

Need help figuring out where to go and what to do? Let me be your guide. Email me to schedule your free half hour session to juliakellercoaching@gmail.com or sign up to my upcoming Irresistible Woman workshops (listed below). Or join me and over 20 other Love Coaches for the Irresistible Woman Summit organised by Nicole Moore to find out some of our free tips on How to be an Irresistible Woman by clicking HERE

New beginnings

This year is the first in so many ways.  It is the first year in which I truly feel that I am fulfilling my mission in life.  It is the first of so many important opportunities to fully have looked into myself and discovered who I really am and what I am meant to do in the bigger picture of life.  And it is, most importantly, the first time in a very long time that what I do as my job is what I have always wanted to do: to help women learn to feel good about themselves and to empower them to create the lives that they truly want to have, especially to create the love life that they ideally want. I have been doing this for years already, but now I am doing this for a living and able to focus on it entirely and completely – which means that I can do it better.206bef42-953d-4f22-a695-432d94ea1e49

For the first time ever, I can spend as much time as I want really helping women to find that inner love and personal confidence in themselves and then to teach them how to go out there and take control of their lives to make their love life happen as they want it to, not waiting for someone else to do it for them.

Not too long ago I ended some very important relationships in my life because I did not feel that they were right for me long term.  Several years before that, I ended, with the paperwork to demonstrate its finality, my relationship with my husband (and the father of my children) of more than eight years.  I did not stop to worr

y at any point in any of these finalities of whether I would ever meet someone truly suited to me who I’d want to spend the rest of my life with. I just knew that I eventually would, if I wanted to. I never worried when leaving my husband – who was the main financial provider of our family – whether I would be able to survive without the ample financial means that marriage and life together with him provided. I just assumed that I would be fine. Now, many years after I took that brave move that set my life initially into darkness, I know that I will be much more than just fine. And I can honestly say that I have been more than fine after the end of each relationship that finished after that.

Not only that I was more than fine, but every ending brought about what was necessary for an even better beginning. Everything that didn’t work brought a further learning, both of myself, and of relationships in general. So that every time after the end of each relationship, I took the time to really meditate and consider my part in all that happened and what I learned from it, thereby further perfecting my knowledge and myself. Every new beginning to every new relationship created something that was better than what I had left behind.

This is not of course to say that we should always leave something in the hopes of finding something better. In fact, much of my coaching is done with women who are in relationships already and who I help to value what they have so that they can truly appreciate how lucky they are to have it and then to even improve on it to such a degree that the relationship that they help to create, with just the right amount of coaching to empower them to create it, is a relationship so vastly improved from what they had when they first came to see me. So no I am not a supporter of walking away always in search of the better thing around the corner. But I do advocate walking away from something that isn’t working if it really doesn’t feel like it ever will be that which you seek. This is courage in and of itself; and it is a courage that comes from valuing who you are and what you stand for, and from knowing that you are amazing enough to have many other, better options than being stuck in something that isn’t working. This is what I do in my practice: I empower women with this kind of self-belief so that they never feel stuck again.

Want to learn how to become that ideal woman who has the power to attract the right kind of man? Join me for one of my upcoming workshops or work with me One to One for an even deeper transformation.

A Highly Irresistible Christmas Offer

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It’s that time of year again… There are lights hanging around Oxford Street, one of the big shopping areas of London, and the tree is up in Rockefeller Center, as the ice skating rinks get full and that familiar, festive aroma of mulled wine, hot cider, and winter holiday cheer is in the air again. Are you in the Christmas spirit yet?

While for many Christmas is an exciting, beautiful time of love, family, gifts, and wonderful connections; for too many others it’s a time of too much stress, family they don’t want to be with, friends that seem to be having a better time than they are, and that feeling of loneliness due to the fact that they don’t have that someone special to share the holiday with.

How about you? What does Christmas feel like to you? Are you happy and celebrating with family and loved ones that bring a cheerful smile to your face and a feeling of happiness to your heart? Or do you feel lonely and alone with that gnawing sensation that it’s pretty much impossible to attract the kind of partner you really want AND to keep him long enough for the next Christmas to come?

Do you feel often that the truly good men are taken, OR that you’re a magnet for the wrong men? OR that even if you do find a man you like, it’s a struggle to get him to commit and stick around for the holidays, like Christmas, or your birthday, that you keep wishing you can spend that someone special with?

If this is how you’re feeling now, don’t despair…help is here and it’s my very special gift to you this Christmas: so that next Christmas, you’ll be one of those women who you envy with that special someone devoted to you and excited to spend this festive time of family and love with you. Does this sound unbelievable?

Some months ago, I was approached by a well-known Love Coach living in Los Angeles, California to participate in something ground-breaking that allowed me to begin to fulfil one of my many missions: to help women to become that elusive Highly Irresistible Woman that they all want to become but don’t know how. I’ve been working towards fulfilling this mission for some time, in fact, with a book on the subject in the works and my many online and in-person workshops about to be launched next year. So when Nicole Moore, of The Love Works Method, approached me to ask me to be one of her small, elinicole-moore-julia-kellerte group of Love Coaches (mainly from the US) teaching women our techniques to become irresistible, I of course jumped at the chance! I’m thrilled to announce that I’m a featured guest expert on The Highly Irresistible Woman Series, a free virtual video series hosted by my colleague Nicole Moore.

In this series, you will learn how to be a Highly Irresistible Woman from many of the world’s experts on love, dating, and relationships. During this free virtual event, I’ll be sharing my top strategies to be a Magnet for High-Quality Men along with more than 30 of the World’s Leading Love Experts. You’ll discover how to be that Highly Irresistible Woman that men crave and want to commit to and learn how dating can stop being a struggle and start being really fun.

This is my free Christmas offer to you. If you want love, you don’t want to miss this event. Click here for your all access pass to The Highly Irresistible Woman Series. Click here to register and join in on the fun.

And then once you’ve gone through the series, I’m offering you one free hour-long session with me to be taken in January or February only, to make sense of all you’ve learned or to ask whatever pressing question you may have about love or a current relationship. Just email me to juliakellercoaching@gmail.com quoting “Free Christmas Offer”. And please do feel free to share this newsletter or the link above with anyone who you think can also benefit from this offer or from the Irresistible Woman Series. Our mission is to help every woman uncover her own person Irresistibility; so here’s to yours! 

Julia xx

“What the world needs now is love, sweet love…”

Friday the 13th of November 2015 in Paris will now be a date that’s deeply etched into the memories of most of the Western world, especially of those of us in Europe. Just as September 11th, 2001 is still a date that most think about and shudder, the ruthless shootings of innocent people in Paris is another terrorist act that makes us question the anger in the world today. But these dates are in no way isolated incidences, nor, unfortunately, are terrorist acts something rare or novel. When I was thinking about writing this blog, I was really stuck on how to adequately phrase my reflections and my emotions about what happened in Paris just recently. Though terrorism is nothing new and terrorist acts of some kind date all the way back to the 1800s and before, terrorism has, frighteningly, become more prevalent and more violent in our modern times.

So what can we do? Is there any way to change the anger hidden that inevitably causes these crimes against innocent people? Though I wasn’t alive in the 1960’s, the song that came into my head immediately is the one that used one of my favourite words in the chorus: “What the world needs now is love, sweet love… It’s the only thing that we have too little of…” As a Love Coach, of course I will always revert to talking about the importance of love. It’s my job, after all. But, for me, it’s become much more than just a job; it’s become a calling. When I look at the world now, I see a much more dispersed and disillusioned world than ever. With each decade even, certain trends seem to worsen. The divorce rates go up; the marriage rates go down; more articles are written about how many people are single and lonely, but also more difficult to please; and more unhappiness and anger is seen throughout the world.

Something has to change. The growth of online dating, and dating apps, which should serve to help more people connect with other people, rather seems to lead to an increased disconnect, where the search for the superficial and the ease of always finding something better becomes that block that keeps people from attempting to go deeper into each other. A friend of mine who felt this disconnect deeply, even though he was dating many women at once, said to me: “The problem is that everything is about the next best thing. No one sticks it out anymore; no one tries to improve a relationship that’s broken. Why should we when there’s always something better around the corner?” Interestingly enough, after years of dating many women at once, he’s now back together with his ex-wife, with whom he says he always had “a very deep connection”.

I am not saying, of course, that we all should seek out that one partner with whom we ended it years ago and try and make a go of it again. Of course not! Usually things end for a reason. But perhaps maybe we should ease our trigger fingers from ending relationships too quickly too because of some small inadequacy or because we believe that something better might come along and not just with lovers and Partners, but also the relationships we have with family and friends. Perhaps we should make more of an attempt towards a deeper connection and a deeper understanding of people in our lives: be it lovers, friends, or even neighbours. Maybe we should take some time to step away from our computer screens and actually see and get to know the people who live beside us and are around us. Why not actually greet our neighbours and call those family members who we haven’t spoken to in a while?

Human relations are still about actual face to face contact, and that is not something that we should ever give up. People who feel touched and truly loved then do not have the compulsion to hurt others in such a violent and pointless way. Plus, let’s not forget about the idea of the “butterfly effect”. If we are compassionate and show love in one part of the world, that love will then echo throughout the rest of the world and maybe land where it’s most needed. If we all can open up our hearts and show compassion for others, perhaps the world would indeed be a better place.

Julia xx

Giving thanks on this day of Thanksgiving

This month is the month of Thanksgiving (at least in the US). Thanksgiving, officially is a holiday celebrated in the United States on the fourth Thursday in November and is now known as the “eating holiday” because it is more defined by eating an abundance of turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, yams, pumpkin everything, and all kinds of pies (pumpkin, pecan, apple…) than by actually remembering to be thankful for anything (which was really the original point of the holiday). According to Wikipedia, “the event that Americans commonly call the ‘First Thanksgiving’ was celebrated by the Pilgrims after their first harvest in the New World in 1621.The New England colonists were accustomed to regularly celebrating ‘thanksgivings’— days of prayer thanking God for blessings such as military victory or the end of a drought. So it is these colonists that we can thank for the idea of giving thanks.

The idea behind Thanksgiving was supposed to be a day when we think about things and people that we are grateful for and when we remember those things and give thanks for them. Even though I am currently living in London, I still celebrate Thanksgiving every year. When I was in the US, Thanksgiving dinner would normally be a big group of family and close family friends gathering at my parents’ house. My home these days is too small for a big group, so my celebration every year is a smaller one, just with close friends and their children. I do focus on the food of the holiday of course (that is after all one of the best parts). But I also think it’s important to not forget the thankfulness part of the holiday. After all, how often do we really remember to be grateful for what we have. Normally, it’s the opposite: we walk around thinking about what we lack, what we don’t like, and what we’d like to change, or at least where we’d like to be eventually (that isn’t where we are at the moment).

But, though looking to better ourselves in our lives is of course a very important part of self-development and achieving success, it is no less important in the achievement of happiness than being grateful for who we are and what we’ve already achieved. In fact, according to Harvard Health Publications in their online article about the research about gratitude they write that “In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.” Getting in touch with what one is grateful for, either about themselves or about their life or Partner, is an exercise I do with my clients when I help to refocus them on the positive. By looking at what we do have, rather than focusing on what is missing, we are able to very dramatically begin to change our life outlook, which therefore begins that change towards that better life and love life that we crave.

So in this very important time of Thanksgiving, I want to give thanks to the important people in my life who are the reasons why I am here and why I’m making the work I’m doing with clients and with women in my workshops and women’s groups into my mission. Thank you. I appreciate you all.

Julia xx

First in so many ways

Dear All ,

This year is the first in so many ways.  It is the first year in   which I truly feel that I am fulfilling my mission in life.  It is the first of so many important opportunities to truly have looked into myself and discovered who I really am and what I am meant to do in the bigger picture of life.  And it is, most importantly, the first time in a very long time that what I do as my job is what I have always wanted to do: to help women learn to feel good about themselves and to empower them to create the lives that they truly want to have, especially to create the love life that they ideally want. I have been doing this for years already, but now I am doing this for a living and able to focus on it entirely and completely.

For the first time ever, I can spend as much time as I want really helping women to find that inner love and personal confidence in themselves and then to teach themhow to go out there and take control of their lives to make their love life happen as they want it to, not waiting for someone else to do it for them.

Not too long ago I ended some very important relationships in my life because I did not feel that they were right for me long term.  Several years before that, I ended, with the paperwork to demonstrate its finality, my relationship with my husband (and the father of my children) of more than eight years.  I did not stop to worry at any point in any of these finalities of whether I would ever meet someone truly suited to me who I’d want to spend the rest of my life with. I just knew that I eventually would, if I wanted to. I never worried when leaving my husband – who was the main financial provider of our family – whether I would be able to survive without the ample financial means that marriage and life together with him provided. I just assumed that I would be fine. Now, many years after I took that brave move that set my life initially into darkness, I know that I will be much more than just fine. And I can honestly say that I have been more than fine after the end of each relationship that ended after that.

Not only that I was more than fine, but every ending brought about what was necessary for an even better beginning. Every new beginning to every new relationship created something that was better than what I had left behind. This is not of course to say that we should always leave something in the hopes of finding something better. In fact, much of my coaching is done with women who are in relationships already and who I help to value what they have so that they can truly appreciate how lucky they are to have it and then to even improve on it to such a degree that the relationship that they help to create, with just the right amount of coaching to empower them to create it, is a relationship so vastly improved from what they had when they first came to see me. So no I am not a supporter of walking away always in search of the better thing around the corner. But I do advocate walking away from something that isn’t working if it really doesn’t feel like it ever will be that which you seek. This is courage in and of itself; and it is a courage that comes from valuing who you are and what you stand for, and from knowing that you are amazing enough to have many other, better options than being stuck in something that isn’t working. This is what I do in my practice: I empower women with this kind of self-belief so that they never feel stuck again.

Julia xx

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – Take Flight

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog 

So last Friday night the wing ladies assembled again. Preened and ready for the kill (I mean the flirt).

We hit Soho, and after a false start in a very “coupled up” piano bar we decided to begin practising on the patrons pouring out of a bar nearby (and no – it wasn’t a gay bar).

I started early, doing the look into my eyes trick and was having fun locking eyes with a chap across the bar while we were waiting for drinks to be served. He was a good-looking bloke and I was mindful of the Love Coach‘s advice about practising on those that you’re not interested in before being confident enough to try it out on those that you fancy.

So as our drinks were ready and Julia ordered us outside to begin flirting, I led the charge…

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LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – Get Your Flirt On

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog 

So people – it’s happening. Following my make-over last week, and after practising the eye contact game, I’ve been on some practical flirting sessions with a team of wing women assembled by Love Coach Julia Keller.

I bought a new black frock for the occasion [one that showed off the décolletage] and dutifully swapped between flats and high heeled shoes (because I still kind of look like Bambi on Ice in heels).

To continue reading press here 

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – Look in my eyes

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog

They say the eyes are the window to your soul. And it would seem when embarking on the art of flirting, my eyes are going to play a key part in helping me win over the opposite sex.

We apparently all have appealing features when it comes to making an instant impression, whether it be a nice smile, great cheekbones, great teeth, long legs, a pert butt, shiny hair or a good decolletage.

After a brief assessment from my Love Coach, it would seem that my eyes are my best feature but I’ve not been making the most of them. Apparently, my décolletage has also been hiding under a bushel, so I’m now under orders to make them both shine.

To continue reading press here 

LOVE IN SLOW LANE – The Zone

Natalie Davison’s  Personal Blog

Dear Blog,

It’s been four weeks since my last post…… sorry. A lack of focus got in the way and a thing called summer.

But I’m back and ready to share some stories and insight into the male species that I’ve uncovered in the past few weeks.

My Love coach has been abroad for part of the time, so I’ve been free-styling a bit. Maybe so much so that after we met following the summer break I’m now on a X10 acceleration plan to get flirting and dating, so expect some hilarious posts in the coming weeks!!

But anyway, when I was left to my own devices, all was not lost. I put to practise some of the techniques I’ve learned, and have been wearing make-up everyday. But what I think I’ve learned most from my chats with Julia is about confidence. And I think I’m not alone in that most women lack confidence, particularly when it comes to dating and meeting men.

To continue reading press here 

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – Mr. Opinionated

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog

My grandpa always had a saying – “silence is golden”.

So why is it in the modern world that we live that everyone seems to not be content with just having an opinion, but telling everyone in earshot what that opinion is.

I wasn’t going to write this blog post because I didn’t want to give more energy or negative thought to my encounter. However after posting on Facebook about my experience, it was clear I’d struck a chord.

You see I’m fat. Overweight, carrying extra timber, large, big – whatever you want to call it. I know this, but I’m also doing something about it.

I know about it because it’s me that has to carry me around each day, it’s me that has to find joy in going to the shops and hoping and praying they have some larger sizes on their racks for me to try on or it’s back to the potluck of online shopping, it’s me who is always conscious about taking up too much space on the tube seat, airplane seat, (insert any communal seat).

To continue reading press here 

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – Armour or amore?

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog

Anyone who knows me knows I’m not a negative person, but it would appear that when it comes to my love life I fear the worst, brace for a disaster and build up a fortress that the Romans would be proud of.

No member of the opposite sex has a hope in hell of cracking through Fortress Nat.

That was until I started my chats with Love Coach Julia Keller and last week she put a chink in my armour.

And as a consequence, I’ve had a bit of a roller-coaster week. I talked last week about my realisation of letting it go, just like Elsa in her icy palace! But it seems I was more Frozen in my spot than I thought. Before I could take the next step, I needed to resolve my mindset when it comes to relationships.

To continue reading press here 

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – Let it go

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog 

People who know me, know that I’m a bit of a karaoke fan.

I’m the first to admit that I can’t carry a tune to save myself. But I rationalise my ridiculous enthusiasm with the fact that everyone loves a trier.

There’s something completely cathartic about taking the microphone and throwing your heart and soul into belting out a classic tune. It just makes me feel good. Dolly Parton 9 to 5 is my all time favourite but I’m also known to attack, with full gusto, modern tunes, even of the Disney variety.

And that’s what happened this week. I was set a test by Love Coach Julia Keller and it was all part of learning to let go. So as well as doing the exercises (which have been cathartic in themselves), I’ve also been walking around most of the week with the tune from Frozen dancing through my brain. I’ve even been doing the “shazam” frozen hand gestures at the chorus parts for extra gusto (thank god I live by myself!).

To continue reading press here 

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – Put your face on

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog 

Until last week, I could probably count on one hand how many times I’ve worn make-up this year.

I went to a wedding in April (that’s a make-up occasion), and a Christening in May, and (scratches head …..), oh yes, I got a Commendation from a Chief Constable in April (hmmm, why is it that I only make the effort when the event involves a church and/or authority???)

It’s not that I don’t think make-up has it’s benefits, because I know it can hide a multitude of sins and if you know how to do it right, it can make your best features even better. The problem is that I’m just not very good at it. I even went to a make-up class a few years ago to learn how to apply make-up. Unfortunately my smokey eye looked more like punched in the eye when I tried to apply the techniques at home.

So when I met with Julia for my next love coaching session we talked about self-image.

To continue reading press here

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – The wait

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog 

Time is of the essence. I watched a movie today called Still Alice. It was based on a book by Lisa Genova and evolves around the character Alice, a Harvard professor, who at the age of 50 is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.

I cried buckets.

Before her diagnosis Alice was successful, career-driven and the mother of three children. On the surface she had everything. But the movie got me thinking about the importance of the here and now, of making the most of every moment. Because as the story of Alice brought home – things can change in an instant.

To continue reading press here 

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE – The hedgehog affect

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog

I consider myself to be a fairly switched on person. So it was with surprise that during an initial discussion with Love Coach Julia Keller that she pointed out something that should’ve been very obvious to me.

We were discussing what I wanted in life, whether my aim was to be married and have kids etc. I said no to both. If I do happen to meet “the one” then that’s enough for me. I don’t need the big dress and an expensive day if I have someone by my side who is committed and trusting, that’s enough. On the child front, it’s just never been a great urge. I am lucky to have loads of nieces and nephews and friends who provide plenty of “kid” time for me to have my fix. I’m not shutting the door completely on the idea, because I’ve often thought about the option of adopting. But as a 40-year-old single woman I’m not at all bothered about the “tick tock” of my biological clock nor am I looking at the best options for freezing eggs.

To continue reading press here

LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE

Natalie Davison’s Personal Blog

I’m sceptical. I don’t know why, but it’s a natural disposition for me to question things. Maybe that’s why I’ve built a career as a journalist and in public relations. I’m always searching for the bear trap, the catch in any situation. So when I recently had the opportunity to witness the transformation of a member of a networking group I’d been attending, I must admit I was amazed.

To continue reading press LOVE IN THE SLOW LANE[/fusion_text]